Bataan: A European illusion...

7:30 AM, Still half-asleep, still questioning my life choices — specifically the one where I agreed to leave a giant ship via fishing boat to explore Bataan. Most people take a bus. Or a car. Or literally anything with four wheels and zero sharks. But no — we had to climb down a vertical ladder off our ship, into a boat the size of a large bathtub, and bounce across the waves like budget Bond villains.

My husband? Calm as a monk ( he is a sailor, after all),  Me? Silently googling how to draft a will under 5 minutes. But guess what? We made it. And within 10 minutes of stepping onto land and into a tricycle, I realized I wasn’t in survival mode anymore — I was in a movie. A low-budget, high-reward travel rom-com. 

We took a local bus and headed to Balanga City. Our first stop: "Stregato Gelateria". Walked in for gelato, walked out convinced I was in Venice. Chandeliers, green-pink windows, Italian music… and a meal for just $7?! I would’ve paid double just to feel that fancy again. 

Next up: "Michell’s Cakes & Pastries", We walked past a Starbucks and chose this cute local bakery for coffee and cupcakes. The vibe? Straight out of a Parisian Pinterest board: candelabras, emerald doors, big mirrors. The cupcakes? Buttery, sinful, and emotionally healing.The coffee? So strong I briefly considered climbing another fishing boat.

And just when I thought it couldn’t get better…came the showstopper: A 40‑minute ride to "Las Casas Filipinas de Acuzar " in Bagac. This wasn’t a destination, it was a time wrap. Over 27 Spanish colonial buildings — actual historical houses, dismantled and rebuilt brick by brick around the Philippines — all restored in one magnificent heritage park. On one side: mountains. On the other: the sea. And in between? Absolute magic. We were in Fake Spain. Gondolas, stone bridges, beach beds, cobblestone streets, and cafés that served sangria, what more could I really ask for? The food, every bite made me feel like I was in a Spanish telenovela. I nearly proposed to my plate.

As the sun dipped and the flamenco music in my head slowed down, it was time to head back. A tiny part of me wanted to throw my phone into the sea, become a gelato seller at Stregato Gelateria , and live my best here. But I didn’t. I followed my spouse back to the ship, full of food, stories, and the kind of wanderlust only a surprise Euro‑vibe in the Philippines can spark.

Sometimes the best adventures start with panic, involve tiny boats, and end with Spanish-style architecture and cupcakes under $1. Next time you want to go to Europe, maybe… check Bataan first.